Monday October 23rd, 2017
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2016 Pre-Season “Slammies” awards! (by Mooch)

 

2016 Preseason Slammies:

Before the list I would like to say "THESE ARE ALL IN FUN BUT DEAD ON"… These are things that have been EYE WITNESSED N HAVE CREDIBLE SOURCES!!! If you got THIN SKIN, DON'T READ… Hope Everyone enjoys, N COMMENTS ARE WELCOMED!!! 

P.S. I MIGHT DIE ON THE MOUND THIS YEAR.

1. BIGGEST COOKIE THROWER ON THE MOUND- Justin Mooch (SEE I CAN TAKE IT)

2. CONFERENCE PLAYER MOST LIKELY TO BE TOLD HE'S NOT ALLOWED TO GO ON A RIDE AT SIX FLAGS- Dennis Rulli 

3. WORST BREAKUP OF 2016 Andrew VitcakDaniel Kirkwood / Keith Laski 
THESE 3 SHARED A KING BED THE LAST 2 SEASONS WITH PRECISION… GUESS THIS YEAR WITH ALL 3 BEING ON DIFFERENT TEAMS IT'S JUST REGULAR BED, TEARS, N TISSUES..
4. MANAGER WHO WAS ONCE A 70'S PORN STAR- Larry Quartuccio
5. PLAYER MOST LIKELY TO COME OUT WITH HIS OWN ACTION FIGURE- Filip Washington… I MEAN HELL, GUT HAS MADE HIS OWN SHOES, SHIRTS, BATTING GLOVES, SOCKS N RUMOR HIS OWN GLOW IN THE DARK CONDOMS!!!
6. TEAM N STAFF GUARANTEED TO BE DRUNK THE WHOLE WEEKEND -THEIR BACK "TARZ NATION" (WITH TROUPE N KENNY) 
7. BEST YOU TUBE N FBOOK SENSATIONS- TODD ERICKSON N Zach Ross MY GOD JUST STOP!!!
8. PLAYER TO LOSE AT MAJOR WORLD SERIES N TELL HIS TEAM IN A HUDDLE (WHILE CRYING) "I'M BACK 100%NEXT YEAR… 5 MINUTES LATER SIGNS WITH John Backman – VITZLANDER 
9.HAVE MANUFACTURER PLAYER DEALS BUT CAN'T FIND A TEAM
Chris Larsen L.C. WATSON
10.TEAM MOST LIKELY TO FINISH TOP 10, BUT ONLY HAVE 7 PLAYERS – PRECISION.
11. PLAYER MOST LIKELY TO JUMP OFF THE GOLDEN GATE BRIDGE IF HE DOES ENTRY FIND A CONFERENCE TEAM
WHEELER HUFF
12.4 PLAYERS TO TURN ALOT HEADS THIS YEAR Evan Jarman Bo Andrews Cole Patterson N HEATH BARNES..
13.BIGGEST TROLLER ON FACEBOOK
Vincent Blake… IF YOUR IN THE CONFERENCE N POST ON FB, THIS GUY WILL LIKE OR REPLY IN 2.2 SECONDS FLAT…
14. MOST UNDERRATED HITTERS IN THE CONFERENCE.. Steven LopezMandy Stephany Jason Joseph
15.PLAYERS WHOSE BALLS CAN BE FOUND IN THEIR WIVES PURSE
Clif N Danielle Kristen A Joey TreyandTeri Gilliland … U SHARE A FB ACCOUNT I'M GONNA GET YOU…
16. HANDS DOWN MOST UNDERRATED COACH… KNOWS THE GAME AS WELL AS ANYONE Brian Doc Kildea
17. MOST LIKELY TO HAVE "SWAMPASS" THE ENTIRE TOURNAMENTJoey Powell
18.PLAYER MOST LIKELY TO BREAKUP A MAJOR TEAM MERGER (REDS /PRECISION ) MOOCH… So I've been told!!!
19. CONFERENCE PLAYER WHO LOOKED LIKE A GREEK GOD IN APRIL OF LAST YEAR THEN LOOKED LIKE A BEAT UP BAG OF DOG POO IN NOVEMBER – Chris Greinert
20. FINALLY KEITH LASKI… UM, I'LL LEAVE THIS 1 ALONE FOR NOW…
SEE EVERYONE IN APRIL…
LOVE U ALL…

 


 

Past Slammies:

Here ya go…..
2016 ALL CONFERENCE SLAMMIES!!!!  (yearly awards from Mooch)
These are all in Good Fun but also very SPOT ON… So your either a GOOD SPORT N LAUGH, OR YOUR A GRUMPY F**K…

1. BEST SELFIES- NEWBREED N TEAM COMBAT.. (ACTUALLY ANY TEAM Ryan Goodman OR Brian Gimmiedat Zirkle ARE ON THAT WEEKEND )
2. MOST HITTING VIDEOS UPLOADED- David Miller N Grant Grimmett. Lucky for Above all they picked both up this year to play with them.. Brian Doc Kildea must of saw SOMETHING SPECIAL.
3. PLAYER MOST LIKELY TO HAVE A BLOOD ALCOHOL LEVEL TWICE THE LEGAL LIMIT DURING A TOURNAMENT GAME- Joel A Ramos NAdam Rockoff
4. COUPLE OF THE YEAR Daniel Kirkwood N Andrew Vitcak
5. PLAYER MOST LIKELY TO INBOX YOUR GIRLFRIEND ON FACEBOOK Keith Laski
6.PLAYER MOST LIKELY TO GET LAID AT A TOURNEY BEFORE HE EVEN STEPS ON THE FIELD- Brett McCollum
7. BEST TATTOOS Luis Reyna Cory Boothe Justin Mooch
8.BEST "AFRICAN AFRMERICAN" PLAYER- Filip Washington N Josh Riley… (YES PEOPLE RILEY IS BLACK)
9.PLAYER MOST LIKELY TO GO IN THE OTHER TEAMS DUGOUT BEFORE THE GAME N PROCEEDED TO HUG N KISS EVERYONE'S ASS- Shawn Jones
10. MOST VALUABLE CALORIES..
OFFENSIVE Brendt Newbill N JON JAMISON
DEFENSIVE Tim Howard
11. MOST CIGARETTES SMOKED AT A TOURNEY Faron Miller 
12. MOST LIKELY TO CALL THE SPONSOR N CRY LIKE A BITCH IF HE WASN'T IN THE LINEUP-Donald 'Buckshot' Plaisance
13. MOSTLY LIKELY TO SPEAK THEIR MIND, CUZ THEY DON'T GIVE A FUCK- Chris Greinert N Jason Branch (LOVE THESE 2 THEY TELL IT HOW IT IS)
14.MOST LIKELY TO WIN A AWARD N POST IT IMMEDIATELY ON FACEBOOK KEITH LASKI
15.BEST BEARD Ryan Harvey N Chitty Baggs
16. BEST LOOK GOOD, FEEL GOOD, PLAY GOOD ATTITUDE – Orlando Castillo
17.PLAYER I CAN'T BELIEVE IS IN THE CONFERENCE, CUZ ACCORDING TO HIM HE SHOULD BE IN THE MLB- ANDY "VITZLANDER" VITCAK 
18. BEST HASH TAGGER – Isaac Gonzalez 
(# I'M JOKING ‪#‎YOURSHITISGAY‬ ‪#‎GROWTHEFUCKUP‬ ‪#‎SERIOUSLY‬
19. BEST TEAMMATE/GUITAR PLAYER Shaun Ballard (11 YEARS OF FRIENDSHIP, LUV YA BUD)
20. PERSON OF THE YEAR Dale Weiser!!! HANDS DOWN DOES SO MUCH FOR THE GAME… I THANK YOU DALE, N KEEP UP THE GREAT WORK….

 

 

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